Troll 2 -
Have you survived the horror of Nilbog? Drop your favorite terrible movie in the comments. And remember: Don't eat the green food.
Claudio Fragasso actually thought he was making a terrifying horror film. He wanted to criticize vegetarianism and American consumerism. He wanted to scare children. The fact that he created a slapstick comedy about haunted corn and magical cold cuts is not irony—it’s alchemy. His utter sincerity is the fuel that makes the fire burn so bright. Troll 2 doesn’t get the "Worst Movie Ever" crown from me as an insult. It is a celebration. In an era of polished, focus-grouped, algorithm-approved blockbusters, Troll 2 is a beautiful, screaming reminder that someone, somewhere, had a vision. That vision was broken, badly executed, and completely insane—but it was a vision . troll 2
I have seen Eraserhead . I have seen The Holy Mountain . I have never been as confused as I was during the scene where a grandpa ghost shows up to hand Joshua a bologna sandwich as a weapon. What makes Troll 2 legendary isn’t just one flaw—it’s a perfect storm of three. Have you survived the horror of Nilbog
No human being has ever said the following sentence with a straight face: "They're eating her... and then they're going to eat me... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOD!" This line, delivered by a young actor as he watches his girlfriend get slowly absorbed into a plant, has achieved immortality. It is the "Rosebud" of the bad movie world. Claudio Fragasso actually thought he was making a
Director Claudio Fragasso (under the pseudonym "Drake Floyd") reportedly told his English-speaking cast to act "more American." The result is a cast of children, amateurs, and locals who perform every emotion—fear, joy, confusion—at the same volume: maximum overdrive . The dad, Michael, delivers lines like a man who just realized he left the oven on. The mom, Diana, looks perpetually like she’s smelling a bad egg.
Watch it alone, and you’ll laugh. Watch it with friends, and you’ll create a religion. Watch it stoned at 2 AM, and you might just see the face of God (who looks suspiciously like a goblin in a rubber mask holding a corncob).
Five stars. Zero quality. Infinite joy.